Announcing My New Children’s Book–A Free Weekly Serial!

Did you know that when Charles Dickens was serializing The Old Curiosity Shop, people in Boston would actually stand on the docks waiting for the ship to arrive bearing the next installment of the novel. Some would actually call out to the ship as it coasted into the harbor, “Did Little Nell die???”

We love serials, don’t we? I love them so much, I decided to write one myself and share it with you even as I write it.

Starting today, Friday, April 12, the next installment in my humorous Kingdom of Patria series for middle grade readers (ages approximately 8-12)  will begin to be serialized on the Kingdom of Patria. Just go to the Read and Listen Online section of the site to find the Prologue and Chapter One.

(Note that the posts are ordered with the most recent post first, so scroll down a bit to find the Prologue. After the Prologue all chapter numbers will be listed in the post title.)

This new book is a Patria prequel. It attempts to answer the question that I know has been gnawing at the innards of readers of the series like undercooked hamburger:

How DID those Trojan refugees find their way to present-day Indiana 3,000 years ago?

It’s a question I’ve often thought about since I first imagined the world of Patria, and now I’m finally trying to answer it. Both for you, and for myself.

The new book is entitled:

An As Yet Untitled Patria Prequel

But Which At Any Rate is the Wild and Wondrous Adventure of the Accidental Forces of the Trojan Rear-Guard Remnant in Its Voyage to the New World

More than that I cannot divulge.

Except that it’s something of an ancient urban mytho-fantasy epic odyssey involving all manner of fantastic creatures such as prehistoric capybaras, a two-eyed cyclops, and one Clodinius Clodnus, Supreme Commander of the Accidental Forces of the Trojan Rear-Guard Remnant.

Oh. I can also guarantee you that in it Little Nell will not die.

No need to stand on the dock in the cold. Just come to the Kingdom of Patria each week to read the latest installment in the comfort of your own easy chair.

There will be a new installment every Friday at noon EST. Until the book is finished, or I get a better offer.

Please feel free to comment on the story, too. I’d like to know what you like and what you don’t like, especially as I am writing the story as I serialize it.

You can comment either in the com boxes of the chapter posts, or on the Trojan Tub Entertainment Facebook Page, or in an email to me at [email protected].

Thanks so much for coming aboard this exciting new Patria adventure!

Oh, and one more thing: interested in reading the first two books in the Kingdom of Patria series? You can find them both on Amazon as print books and as ebooks, and you can also find the ebooks on barnesandnoble.com, Kobo, and iTunes.

P.S. The image above is of the Sack of Troy, an event which plays a very big part in this prequel, and in the world of Patria.

In Defense of High Concepts

One of the strangest examples of the degree to which ordinary life is undervalued is the example of popular literature, the vast mass of which we contentedly describe as vulgar.

So wrote G.K. Chesterton, in a marvelous little essay entitled “A Defence of Penny Dreadfuls,” published in his book, The Defendant, back in 1901. What are penny dreadfuls? Pulp fiction, cheap fiction, cheap in more than one sense, no doubt. But not in every sense. Chesterton’s essay focuses on the boys’ book—i.e., the story of pirates or outlaws, of Robin Hood and Dick Deadshot and the Avenging Nine—stories light on literary merit but heavy on excitement. He asks whether boys should be kept away from such fiction. His answer, perhaps surprisingly, is “no.” [Read more...]

10 Simple Ways to Eliminate Simplistic Rule-Following from Your Writing

Not to worry. Help is on the way.

 

If you’re anything like me, you’re always on the qui vive for a way to help you over your second act hurdles, or enliven your stilted dialogue, or punch-up some punchless characters. In brief, you’re a sucker for any article you stumble upon with a title such as:

“Five Rules for Creating Suspense (Doled Out One Day at a Time)”

or:

“7 Things the Fiction Writer Can Learn from the Pre-Socratic Philosophers”

There’s just something irresistible about an article that promises to deliver the Long Lost Secret of the Incas in a handful of bullet points.

Speaking of the Long Lost Secret of the Incas, David Mamet claims to have definitively located the Long Lost Secret of the Incas–that is, the secret to writing successful fiction–in three simple questions that any author must answer for himself:

Who wants what from whom?

What happens if they don’t get it?

Why now?

These questions are as good as any I’ve found. But the problem is, answering them is notoriously difficult, and so I often find myself running back for help in some “How-to” article. I don’t think there’s anything terribly wrong with this. After all, I’m sure even Shakespeare nicked one or two useful items from

“3 Things To Do with Your Melancholy Protagonist When He Refuses To Perform His Princely Duty and Knock-Off His Usurping Uncle”

1. Get him monologuing

2. Introduce a play-within-a-play

3. More monologuing

But bullet points, just like bullets, can be taken too far. Fiction does have its rules–or better, principles, as Robert McKee calls them in his book, Story. But because fiction is an art, the closer the practitioner stays to the “stuff” of his craft the better. Discussion of principles in the abstract must always be balanced by the study of actual specimens.

That is why I love the approach in novelist David Lodge’s The Art of Fiction. In these fifty short pieces, originally published in The Independent on Sunday in the UK and The Washington Post Book World in the U.S., Lodge teaches the art of fiction by putting before the reader specimen after specimen as illustrations of one or other aspect of the craft.

For example: Jane Austen and Ford Madox Ford on “Beginning”; George Eliot and E.M. Forster on “The Intrusive Author”; Thomas Hardy on “Suspense”; James Joyce on “Interior Monologue”; Henry Fielding on “Showing and Telling,” et cetera.

The result is fifty master classes that show the principles of excellent craftsmanship embedded in their proper context.

Indeed, Lodge’s approach is so good that I think I’m going to steal from it here at The Comic Muse. Why should Lodge have all the fun?

Oh. And as for the “10 Simple Ways to Eliminate Simplistic Rule-Following from Your Writing,” they’re right there in your hands. Use those ten digits to order, or to pick up again, Lodge’s delightful book.

Something to Read During Those Long Speeches at the Oscars

When that costume designer you’ve never heard of launches into that interminable Thank You speech, you’ll want something to read to pass the time. But you’re watching the Oscars. You’re in a Hollywood mood. So why not enjoy High Concepts: A Hollywood Nightmare–available here for just $3.99. Below is an excerpt from Chapter 7, “The Deal,” in which my protagonist, a young out-of-work philosophy professor named Donald Wirt, posing as a Hollywood screenwriter, takes a meeting with some bottom-feeding slasher film producers.

Enjoy!

*          *         *

When he had listened to Miles talk to them on the phone, a certain image of Slasher Films had been conjured in Donald’s imagination. A glass office building, its windows reflecting the clouds placidly drifting through the blue Los Angeles sky. A plush suite filled with smartly dressed people busily working the phones and reading scripts.

Slasher Films, in fact, was located in a seedy area of town in a small, one-storey box-structure on pilings that listed precariously. Connoisseurs of all that is most dehumanizing in twentieth-century architecture would recognize in it the death rattle of Bauhaus. Donald found no outward sign that this grim little box on stilts housed a film production company. But the street address matched the one that Miles had given him.

The door was reached by a flight of stairs at the side of the building. Donald’s knock was answered by a tiny, well-presented woman wearing a surgical mask and plastic surgical gloves. Donald staggered backwards as a wave of the woman’s jasmine perfume slammed into his nostrils.

“Hiya, sweetie! What can I do you for?”

“Good afternoon. Are these the offices of Slasher Films?”

“Got it in one! But sorry, hon, the boys don’t take unsolicited pitches.”

“I have an appointment.”

Really? That’s a first. But I’m kind of new here. Come on in. Ima Bumpus.”

“You’re a what?”

“Ha ha. Wish I had a nickel for every time I heard that. My name’s Ima Bumpus. The boys’ executive assistant. Call me Ima. Need a surgical mask? I like to wear one. The air in here can get kind of gamey.”

Donald refused the surgical mask and followed the woman into the house.

“I’ll get one of the boys,” Ima said, and she hurried through the living room picking up discarded pairs of boxer shorts along the way.

Donald waited in a dreary living room with the blinds drawn. Beer cans and bottles were strewn among stacks of books, magazines, videos, DVDs, and scripts. On a rickety coffee table a crusted dinner plate featured the grizzled bits of a gnawed pork chop embedded in a pool of petrified ketchup. An almost suffocating smell, a mixture of curry and burnt microwave popcorn, seemed to ooze from the walls. On one of the walls were posters showcasing the cream of the Blood and Gore oeuvre: The Devil’s Car Wash, Thumbtack Murders, One-Eyed Jack I through IV. Framed stills from these movies tilted at various angles upon the wood paneling, the dominant themes of which were women screaming and a Rogue’s Gallery of grinning killers wielding instruments both blunt and sharp.

After a long delay a large shaggy man in an old t-shirt and sweats, looking as though he had just been roused from sleep, emerged from the bowels of the house. Ima introduced him as “Mr. Brad Blood” before returning to her desk.

“Hello,” Donald extended his hand, “I’m Dr. Donal—I mean, my name is Donnie Wir—uh, Donnie Percival.”

“Sounds like an identity crisis,” Blood drawled as they shook hands.

“My name is Donnie Percival,” Donald colored.

“You from the Labor Commission?”

“Excuse me?”

“Writer’s Guild? Director’s Guild?”

“No. I’m Donnie Percival. The author of Out, Out, Brief Candle!

“How nice for you. Email me a synopsis.”

Blood turned to go.

“We scheduled a meeting for today,” Donald called him back, his voice cracking. “You offered to buy my script. I’m here to sign the contract.”

Blood stopped.

“Not another one,” he sighed and rubbed his tired face with his hand.

There was an uncomfortable silence until the man turned back to Donald and said:

“I gotta get my brother. Wait here.”

“You’re brothers!” Donald smiled, as if he had just gotten the punchline of a very clever joke.

“Yeah,” Blood sneered. “It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes people in Hollywood go by other names, Dr. Donald Donnie Percival.”

As he waited Donald watched Ima Bumpus read from a book called So You Want to Make It in Hollywood.

Blood returned.

“Sorry, dude, but my brother isn’t well enough to meet with you today—”

“Nonsense!” bellowed a voice, and a moment later there emerged, with a wavering step, the spectral presence of Blood’s brother and co-producer.

“Graham Gore!” he announced himself, far more loudly than was strictly necessary, and extended a shaking hand to Donald.

He was a wiry, sun-starved man of thirty, or fifty, dressed casually in a pair of boxer shorts and fuzzy slippers. He had a gaunt, pasty countenance; wisps of soft blonde hair floated like cobwebs above his balding head.

“I’m Donnie Percival,” Donald said boldly. “I’m here to sign the contract for the sale of my script, Out, Out, Brief Candle!

Gore belched and wavered slightly. Blood reached out to steady him.

Out, Out, Brief Candle! Weird title, man. Wassitbout?”

Donald launched into his memorized pitch.

“Uh. There’s this high school teacher, an assistant vice-principal—”

Gore tipped to the right.

“—who with his girlfriend, the advanced Spanish teacher, plots a series of murders as a means of taking over as principal of the school.”

“That’s his external goal,” Gore clarified with a manic smile. “What’s his internal goal?”

Donald hesitated.

Gore tipped to the left.

“Internal goal?”

“His innermost deepest desire,” Gore explained. “Not the thing he wants, but the thing he needs.”

Donald reflected upon this.

“I guess he just wants power and glory.”

Gore beamed at Donald.

“I think we’ll make a writer of you yet—wassyername?”

Metaphor and the Desire to Know

As obliterating fire lights up a vast forest

along the crests of a mountain, and the flare shows far off,

so as they marched, from the magnificent bronze the gleam went

dazzling all about through the upper air to the heaven.

Homer, Iliad, Book II, lines 455-458 (translation Lattimore)

It is older even than the craft of written story: the desire to compare this to that; to illuminate the perception of one thing by juxtaposing it to some other. This is metaphor, a word derived from a Greek word which literally means “a bearing across” or a “transfer.” My father once saw in Athens a moving van with the company title painted across it: METAPHORA.

One Thing and Another

To understand how transference works in literary terms, consider the passage from Homer in my epigraph. The Achaian army is on the move. The poet wants us to clearly perceive how the dazzling gleam from their bronze armor lights up the sky, so he borrows a perception from elsewhere: a forest fire lighting up the (presumably) night sky along the crest of a mountain. In technical grammatical terms this is a simile (as the poet says “As obliterating fire….”), but we won’t fuss over that distinction. The more intriguing question is, why does the poet bother about “transferring” the image of the forest fire to the image of the marching army? We can imagine a lesser poet describing the marching army by using only the last two lines from the quoted passage:

so as they marched, from the magnificent bronze the gleam went/dazzling all about through the upper air to the heaven.

But the effect in this case would be diminished. The “transference” of the forest fire image helps make vivid the gleam from the bronze armor. It is not so much, perhaps, that the forest fire image is in itself more vivid than the image of the bronze gleam from the armor. After all, can’t we imagine a poet describing the flare of a forest fire along a mountain crest by comparing it to the gleam from the bronze armor of a marching army? At one level, it seems it is the juxtaposition, or collection, of images that vivifies the image of the marching army. The more perceptions there are, the more intense our literary delight. But not just any perceptions will do. Among the images there needs to be likeness in the midst of unlikeness. For the metaphor to work, the flare in the mountains must be like the gleam of the bronze.

The Attraction of Metaphor

In his esteemed work of literary criticism, the Poetics, the Greek philosopher Aristotle asserts that of all the modes of literary expression metaphor is the greatest. He even goes on to contend that he doesn’t think the craft of making metaphors can be taught; it is a mark of genius. Whatever we may think about that, Aristotle concludes his tribute to metaphor by saying that in making good metaphors one is “contemplating” the likenesses of things.

Here is the attraction of metaphor: we love to contemplate the likenesses of things in the midst of their unlikeness. But why? Because in perceiving likeness amidst unlikeness, we deepen our knowledge of the world.

In Homer’s metaphor, the knowledge we gain is mainly perceptual. We understand better the visual effect of the bronze armor’s gleam by comparing it to a forest fire. But the comparison of the armor’s gleam to the fire’s flare also brings with it a sense of awe. For only a vast and terrible army could produce that kind of gleam from its armor, just as only a vast and terrible forest fire could light up the night sky above a mountain.

All human beings desire to know, Aristotle says in another famous text. And we come to know reality, he continues, first of all by making comparisons through our senses, comparisons which ultimately inspire the mind to make deeper distinctions between things. To make a distinction is to discern how one thing is both like and unlike another, a discernment which helps reveal what is essential to each.

So the making of metaphor, in which we ponder likeness amidst unlikeness, is one way in which we express our desire to know; and if Aristotle is right that it is the most important mode of literary expression, then it seems that writers must attend to the making of metaphors.

Learning from The Master

Enough, however, of these minor thinkers. Let’s turn finally to a classical source: the work of the humorist P.G. Wodehouse. Evelyn Waugh, who bowed to no one in his admiration of Wodehouse’s craftsmanship, once praised Wodehouse for being able to produce two to three striking similes or metaphors per page. Such as:

The butler loomed in the doorway like a dignified cloudbank.

Here the obvious unlikeness between butler and cloudbank opens up an enormous gap. But the brilliance of the simile is found in the fact that in a certain skewed, over-the-top perception, there is a sense that a beefy butler looming quietly in a doorway is like a cloudbank. Just as a man’s dancing style can resemble a man giving alms:

“Can you dance?” said the girl.

Lancelot gave a short, amused laugh. He was a man who never let his left hip know what his right hip was doing.

Metaphor, however, whether serious or humorous, is not restricted to local description and color. It can also work for larger thematic purposes. In Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises, bullfighting serves as a metaphor for grace under pressure. T.S. Eliot’s image of “waste land” serves as a metaphor for moral and spiritual decay. Metaphor is in fact the key to all imaginative writing. Indeed all thought and language, if Iris Murdoch is correct, is metaphor. “The development of consciousness in human beings,” Murdoch affirms, “is inseparably connected with the use of metaphor. Metaphors are not merely peripheral decorations or even useful models, they are fundamental forms of our awareness of our condition.”

 

* The image at the top of this post is of the 4th-century Greek philosopher Aristotle.

Dogma and Originality

Steve Jobs is responsible for making the thought iconic for our time:

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma–which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

That’s Jobs in his famous 2005 Stanford University commencement address. The thought is that dogma is opposed to originality. Dogma defined as being trapped by someone else’s paradigm. In The Icarus Deception, Seth Godin approvingly quotes Jeff Bezos saying much the same thing.

Okay. There’s a truth in what Jobs is saying. Creativity of whatever sort demands that we don’t slavishly attempt to reproduce the admired results of others. In terms of being human, authenticity–finding one’s own voice–is obviously a valuable concept.

But in a deeper sense, dogma and originality are not opposed. G.K. Chesterton well articulates the counter-thought to that of Jobs: “It is from the seed of dogma and from that seed alone that all the flowers of art and poetry and devotion spring.”

This may seem counter-intuitive, but think about it. Begin with the highest sense of dogma, religious dogma. There is nothing more perennial and clear than Catholic dogma, and yet there is no group of flowers more wild and various and utterly original than the lives of the saints. On the artistic level, the attempt to create a work of art without first apprenticing oneself to the masters of one’s craft and the craft’s dogmatic principles is to sow only weeds.

Originality–itself a misunderstood and overvalued concept–is the fruit of adherence to dogma.

In Defense of a Popular Literature

Michael Chabon’s instinct is spot on. In his essay, “Trickster in a Suit of Lights–Thoughts on the Modern Short Story,” from his 2008 collection, Maps & Legends: Reading and Writing Along the Borderlands, he makes the case for a literature that does not despise to be entertainment, that challenges the hegemony of “literary fiction,” that seeks to inhabit the borderlands between high art and low genres such as sci-fi, horror, and the western.

Chabon concocts a thought experiment. “Imagine that, sometime about 1950, it had been decided, collectively, informally, a little at a time, but with finality, to proscribe every kind of novel but the nurse romance from the canon of the future”:

Not merely from the critical canon, but from the store racks and library shelves as well. Nobody could be paid, published, lionized, or cherished among the gods of literature for writing any kind of fiction other than nurse romances.

Once this fanciful scenario is in place, Chabon invites us to substitute for nurse romance the “contemporary, quotidian, plotless, moment-of-truth revelatory story.” And once we do so, he predicts, we’re going to find sitting right back in our own world. For the contemporary, quotidian, plotless, moment-of-truth revelatory story wields an almost tyrannic rule over the state of literature.

And let’s not forget, Chabon observes, that the CQPMOTRS (contemporary, quotidian, etc.) has conventions just as rigorous as any popular genre. Such as: “the primacy of a unified point of view, for example; letters and their liability to being read or intercepted; the dance of adulterous partners; the buried family secret that curses generations to come; the ordinary heroism of an unsung life.”

Why, Chabon asks, should this genre trump all others?

Chabon’s critique is squarely on target, and I applaud his desire to explore the “spaces between genres” in order to produce a literature that is as entertaining as it is artful. But what he fails to explain is why the disconnection of literature from entertainment can only occur to the detriment of literature.

“Literature is a luxury; fiction is a necessity.” So G.K. Chesterton famously asserts in his 1901 essay, “In Defense of Penny Dreadfuls.” Similarly to Chabon in “Trickster,” Chesterton in this essay takes on those who would sneer at popular fiction, especially fiction for boys, both because it corrupts and because it does not meet the standards of literature. Chesterton will have none of it, but he defends popular fiction for reasons that are probably very different from Chabon’s:

These common and current publications have nothing essentially evil about them. They express the sanguine and heroic truisms on which civilization is built; for it is clear that unless civilization is built on truisms, it is not built at all.

What truisms does Chesterton have in mind? “The vast mass of humanity, with their vast mass of idle books and idle words, have never doubted and never will doubt that courage is splendid, that fidelity is noble, that distressed ladies should be rescued, and vanquished enemies spared.”

Literary fiction, by contrast, both then and now, tends to eschew such truisms. “It is the modern literature of the educated, not of the uneducated,” contends Chesterton, “which is avowedly and aggressively criminal. Books recommending profligacy and pessimism, at which the high-souled errand-boy would shudder, lie upon all our drawing-room tables.”

It is a good question whether in our day much popular fiction itself wouldn’t offend the sensibilities of a high-souled errand boy–if there are any more errand boys.

Be that as it may, Chesterton and Chabon agree that there is a sharp distinction between literature and fiction. But the truth at least implicit in Chesterton’s essay, but wholly missing from Chabon’s, is that literature and popular fiction exist along a continuum, and not just a literary continuum but a moral one as well. For this reason, when literature becomes profligate and pessimistic, divorcing itself from the entertaining truisms of popular fiction, it becomes what Chesterton calls “criminal.”

And in this light, a fiction along the borderlands of high art and popular fiction is not simply a refreshing change, a way to renew (as Chabon wants) the art of the short story. Rather, it is a way of reintroducing the truisms of civilized life–that is, the humanity–back into our literature.

Who’s Calling? Muriel Spark’s Memento Mori

An elderly woman picks up a telephone and a strange voice says, Remember you must die.

“Who is that speaking, who is it?” the elderly Dame Lettie demands, but the caller, “as on eight previous occasions,” has already hung up.

So who is it that is calling and saying these foreboding words to the cast of geriatrics in Muriel Spark’s blackly comic 1959 novel, Memento Mori?

In one sense, the novel doesn’t tell us. The story ends with the culprit’s identity unrevealed. Mortimer, the retired police inspector who some suspect to be himself the culprit, confides to his wife: “in my opinion the offender is Death himself.” And this, David Lodge comments, “though literally absurd, is metaphorically as near as we get to a solution to the mystery.”

At first I was dissatisfied with Spark’s ambiguous ending to her novel, but Lodge’s comment inspired me to think Memento Mori anew. Lodge describes the book as having many of the conventions of a 19th-century potboiler mixed with “an element of the uncanny.” True enough. Though the elderly folk receiving the phone calls all have their suspicions about the identity of the caller, the caller strangely, as Lodge notes, “speaks in different voices and accents to different people and has an unaccountable knowledge of their movements.”

In his recent provocative piece in the New York Times, “Has Fiction Lost Its Faith?”, Paul Elie expresses a hope that, at least in regard to Christian belief, writers will return to the task of dramatizing belief “the way it feels in your experience, at once a fact on the ground and a sponsor of the uncanny, an account of our predicament that still and all has the old power to persuade.”

Spark has an affinity for events and characters that are sponsors of the uncanny. Recall, for example, the first-person narrator in her masterful short story, “The Portobello Road,” who we discover several pages in is narrating events from beyond the grave. The point of Spark’s use of the mysterious caller in Memento Mori, Lodge remarks, is that through the caller “the existence of a transcendent, eternal and immaterial reality impinges on the lives of [Spark’s] aging characters.”

There are characters in Memento Mori with impressive belief, such as Jean Taylor, who endures the indignities of her nursing home by turning them into an offering:

After the first year she resolved to make her suffering a voluntary affair. If this is God’s will then it is mine. She gained from this state of mind a decided and visible dignity, at the same time as she lost her stoical resistance to pain. She complained more, called often for the bed pan, and did not hesitate, on one occasion when the nurse was dilatory, to wet the bed a the other grannies did so frequently.

About the telephone calls Jean says to her friend, Dame Lettie: “It is difficult for people of advanced years to start remembering they must die. It is best to form the habit while young.”

But most of the characters in Memento Mori have not formed the habit while young, and–phone calls or no phone calls–they do not show much inclination to develop the habit while old. In this way Memento Mori works as a novel about belief by way of negation. For much of the novel’s comedy is generated by the trivial or malicious ways in which the characters drive out the thought of Death, “the first of the Four Last Things to be ever remembered.”

Photo of telephone by Iván Melenchón Serrano from morguefile.com

 

Dubliners and Double Writing

For admirers of the work of James Joyce today, June 16, is celebrated as Bloomsday (as the events of Joyce’s Ulysses take place on June 16, 1904). But in thinking about Joyce today I have turned not to Ulysses but to his collection of short stories, Dubliners (published in 1914). About Joyce’s technique in Dubliners Hugh Kenner observed that it consisted in a kind of “double writing”:

The technique he developed, the technique which underlies everything from the first pages of Dubliners to the end of Finnegans Wake, came out of the subject: parody: double-writing. The music-halls parodied the heroic dramas; Joyce parodied the music-halls. Journalism parodied heroic elegance: Joyce parodied journalism. He focused, that is to say, on what was actually there, and strove so to set it down that it would reveal itself as what it was, in its double nature: a distortion, but a distortion of something real. All his characters are walking clichés, because the Dubliners were… Hugh Kenner, Dublin’s Joyce (New York: Columbia University Press, 1987), p. 11.

One example Kenner sets out is from the story, “A Little Cloud.” A young man named Thomas Chandler is dreaming about a career as a poet:

His temperament might be said to be just on the point of maturity. There were so many different moods and impressions that he wished to express in verse. He felt them within him. He tried to weigh his soul to see if it was a poet’s soul. Melancholy was the dominant note of his temperament, he thought, but it was a melancholy tempered by recurrences of faith and resignation and simple joy. If he could give expression to it in a book of poems perhaps men would listen. He would never be popular: he saw that. He could not sway the crowd but he might appeal to a little circle of kindred minds. The English critics, perhaps, would recognize him as one of the Celtic school by reason of the melancholy tone of his poems; besides that he would put in allusions. He began to invent sentences and phrases from the notice which his book would get. “Mr. Chandler has the gift of easy and graceful verse.” … “A wistful sadness pervades these poems.” … “The Celtic note.”

“Not just the last phrases,” argues Kenner, “but every phrase that passes through Chandler’s mind, from “temperament on the point of maturity” to “the Celtic note,” is reviewers’ jargon; quotation is as close to reality as he gets” (p. 9).

But the jargon, Kenner goes on, had a meaning before the reviewers got hold of it. What Chandler thinks is a distortion, or a cliché, but even the distortion and cliché reflects something of reality, however obliquely. Chandler’s thought, says Kenner, “contains shreds of meaning still. And Chandler is no contemptible gull; he has really felt some wordless emotion stirring within him, and his melancholy is genuine, and he is seriously meditating a career” (p. 9).

The effect produced upon the reader, as Padraic Colum puts it in the Introduction to the Modern Library edition of Dubliners, is “a feeling of detachment”: “It would seem that he had decided to illustrate the life of Dublin through a series of reports, taking this and that incident and being as clear and as unconcerned in the reporting of it as a scientific historian might be” (New York: Modern Library, 1954), xi. (Colum, however, does not attribute such detachment to all the stories in Dubliners–”Eveline” and “The Dead” being among the exceptions).

But to combine Colum’s thought with Kenner’s: what Joyce reports upon so scientifically in Dubliners is talk, language, the rhetoric of a city that “acts on the promptings of idées reçues and talks in words that have for too long been respoken” (Kenner, p. 10).

Thus Kenner concludes–in an observation he attributes to T.S. Eliot*–Joyce has many “voices” but no “style” (p. 12).

* T.S. Eliot, “Lettre d’Angleterre: Le Style dans la Prose Anglaise Contemporaine,” La Nouvelle Revue Française, xix, July-December 1922, 751-6.

Pretty Good Writing Advice

When in the midst of a story I need to refocus on the basic principles of narrative structure, I often (perhaps not often enough) go back to what playwright-screenwriter-director David Mamet, in his book on Hollywood, Bambi vs. Godzilla, calls “The Long Lost Secret of the Incas.” The secret consists in three magic questions. “Anyone who wants to know how to write drama must learn to apply these questions to all difficulties,” says Mamet. “It is not only unnecessary but also impossible to know the answers before setting out on the individual project in question, as there are no stock answers.”

Drama, argues Mamet, is a succession of scenes, and a successful scene must “stringently apply and stringently answer the following questions…”

Are you ready?

Here it is. The Long Lost Secret of the Incas.

  1. Who wants what from whom?
  2. What happens if they don’t get it?
  3. Why now?”

That’s it. As a writer, your yetzer ha’ra (evil inclination) will do everything in its vast power to dissaude you from asking these questions of your work. You will tell yourself the questions are irrelevant as the scene is “interesting,” “meaningful,” “revelatory of character,” “deeply felt,” and so on; all of these are synonyms for “it stinks in ice.”

Mamet’s three magic questions are the concentrated version of the famous leaked memo to the writers of his television show, The Unit, available here.

First principles, however, are not the only kind of principles. If Mamet’s three magic questions are the first principles of good storytelling, then Emma Coats’s 22 storytelling principles making their way around the Internet this week articulate some of the most relevant secondary principles. Coats is a storyboard artist at Pixar, a company that knows a thing or two about good storytelling. The following are the maxims she’s gleaned from her years working at the prestigious animation studio:

1: You admire a character for trying more than for their successes.

2: You gotta keep in mind what’s interesting to you as an audience, not what’s fun to do as a writer. They can be v. different.

3: Trying for theme is important, but you won’t see what the story is actually about til you’re at the end of it. Now rewrite.

4: Once upon a time there was ___. Every day, ___. One day ___. Because of that, ___. Because of that, ___. Until finally ___.

5: Simplify. Focus. Combine characters. Hop over detours. You’ll feel like you’re losing valuable stuff but it sets you free.

6: What is your character good at, comfortable with? Throw the polar opposite at them. Challenge them. How do they deal?

7: Come up with your ending before you figure out your middle. Seriously. Endings are hard, get yours working up front.

8: Finish your story, let go even if it’s not perfect. In an ideal world you have both, but move on. Do better next time.

9: When you’re stuck, make a list of what WOULDN’T happen next. Lots of times the material to get you unstuck will show up.

10: Pull apart the stories you like. What you like in them is a part of you; you’ve got to recognize it before you can use it.

11: Putting it on paper lets you start fixing it. If it stays in your head, a perfect idea, you’ll never share it with anyone.

12: Discount the 1st thing that comes to mind. And the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th–get the obvious out of the way. Surprise yourself.

13: Give your characters opinions. Passive/malleable might seem likable to you as you write, but it’s poison to the audience.

14: Why must you tell THIS story? What’s the belief burning within you that your story feeds off of? That’s the heart of it.

15: If you were your character, in this situation, how would you feel? Honesty lends credibility to unbelievable situations.

16: What are the stakes? Give us reason to root for the character. What happens if they don’t succeed? Stack the odds against.

17: No work is ever wasted. If it’s not working, let go and move on–it’ll come back around to be useful later.

18: You have to know yourself: the difference between doing your best & fussing. Story is testing, not refining.

19: Coincidences to get characters into trouble are great; coincidences to get them out of it are cheating.

20: Exercise: take the building blocks of a movie you dislike. How d’you rearrange them into what you DO like?

21: You gotta identify with your situation/characters, can’t just write ‘cool.’ What would make YOU act that way?

22: What’s the essence of your story? Most economical telling of it? If you know that, you can build out from there.

Mamet’s 3 + Coats’s 22. That’s 25 basic storytelling principles that, if followed–as Mamet tells the writers of The Unit–will buy you a house in Bel Air and allow you to hire someone to live there for you.